Are you angry at God?

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Not long ago I unexpectedly came across the notion that I was angry at God. ‘Nah’, I thought. ‘I’ve got a great relationship with God. Angry at God – no, not me.’ Yet, as the thought lingered, I realized that I was angry at God and although dismayed at first, I actually got quite excited.

I got excited because as I started to share this concept with friends and clients, I realized that many people are angry at God. It’s leftover from our childhood emotions. Weren’t we angry at most people when we didn’t get what we wanted. I’m sure every one of us as children stomped out of a playground screaming ‘I hate you’ or something similar to one of our friends that didn’t give us the toy we wanted.

So if as a child for example, we didn’t get something we wanted because there was not enough money – but there was money to give to God at church or to travel to a religious event, we may have felt confused or even hurt and angry. Children live in a self-centered world where their needs are the most important.

Or think about how many of us heard when Grandma or our favorite pet died, that it was ‘God’s will’ or that they were ‘now in heaven with God’. What does a child care about their beloved dog dying being God’s will, or the grandmother who baked cookies and read them stories being with God in heaven? You just remember feeling the loss, the sadness, the grief and associating it with God taking something away from you that was precious.

I recall vividly as a child having to live a very disciplined, self-sacrificing life, and being different from everybody else because I was told that was God’s will. As one of Jehovah’s Witnesses growing up, I was only on the path to everlasting life, if I was ostracized, persecuted and separate from others. I lived my life as a child watching everybody else celebrate the holidays, sing the national anthem and play school sports and not being allowed to do any of it. Why? Because I was told that it was what God expected from his true followers. It was a difficult concept to grasp -
why I had to be hated by everybody, to be loved by God, but I accepted it for almost 38 years of my life.

Why does it matter if we are angry with God? Whether or not you believe that God is in you or a separate entity that resides in the heavens, I believe that it is ‘God’ that is our Source. Universe, Spirit, Allah, or Yahweh, (whatever you call it), God is the Giver and We are the Receiver. I know that the last time I was angry at someone who wanted to give me something, I didn’t receive it very well. You probably didn’t either. Try accepting something from someone you don’t like and being grateful and appreciative. Doesn’t happen!

I literally saw myself as this stubborn five-year-old, arms folded, with that famous ‘Jan look’ on my face saying, ‘I don’t need you. I’ll do it myself. I’m not taking anything from you.’ Wow – what a revelation when I realized that I had my arms folded across my chest refusing to accept anything from a God that as a child, I had only seen as demanding, vengeful and cruel.

I healed that anger with God and opened up the avenue to Source fully and
completely. Instead of God having to almost sneak my goodness into me through the back door, or under the door while I wasn’t looking, or banging me over the head with it through all of my resistance, I just started to receive and accept and the more I did, the more it flowed.

How do you heal that anger? How you heal anything. You forgive. You forgive yourself for believing what you did, knowing that it was a perfectly normal childhood perception. You forgive your parents for their part in your anger. They were doing the best they could. You forgive your religious upbringing for bring you such a distorted view of God. You forgive God for being the kind of God it was easy to be angry at. You forgive and then you forgive some more.

In my life, I can’t forgive enough. I live in a place of forgiveness for everybody, including myself, and a state of gratitude for everything, including myself.

Are you angry at God? Most likely. It’s worth doing the forgiveness even if you think you aren’t. Watch your life change as you open the floodgates of heaven. God is so incredibly generous and giving – just look around you at nature. It’s not a stingy God that made hundreds of varieties of trees for us to enjoy, all the different flavors of food, and all the amazing colors. Why would God be stingy with us? God’s not! It’s us who is simply not open to receive. Let go of your anger around God and see the bounty in your life.

I know I’m loving the bounty in mine!

I wish you many blessings this month as you forgive and receive.

This information is copyrighted. Please feel free to pass along, use as part of your spiritual newsletters but please keep all information including contact information intact. Thank you for your respect and integrity in this matter.

Jan Janzen is a non-denominational minister, author and entrepreneur. Her book Devil with a Briefcase: 101 Success Secrets for the Spiritual Entrepreneur along with her CD series for the Spiritual Entrepreneur and other resources for the entrepreneur with ethics are available at
www.spiritualentrepreneurinfo.com. For more information on Jan’s ministry and her support of microfinance projects around the world, please visit www.janjanzenministries.com

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