» The Powerful Impact of A Death

A month ago, a business associate in Vancouver passed away at the age of 47, leaving behind a brand new husband and twin girls just a few months old. When I heard the news via a friend’s email, I felt sure that there must be a mistake. How could vibrant Debrah, new Mom and wife, actually be dead?

The last time I had seen Debrah she was heavily pregnant, excited about the
prospect of having twin girls, and very alive. The last time I heard from Debrah was right before Christmas when she sent out her newsletter with pictures of the beautiful little girls. Now she was gone.

Although Debrah wasn’t a close friend, her death hit me hard. For several days, I found myself thinking about her loved ones left behind. The tragedy of two little girls who would never know their mother and a father and husband devastated by the loss of his beautiful new wife was overwhelming. It all seemed so grossly unfair that I found anger, sadness and grief well up in my heart as I contemplated why someone so young, with so much life to live and much to still contribute would be taken from us.

I wrote to a friend that it is in times like this that I find my faith badly
shaken. Although I believe that all is perfect, this death in the moment, seems so imperfect. Although I believe that we get to choose our time to go, Debrah’s death felt so untimely.

Some days later, I picked up my book, The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran and read what he said about death. One of my favorite books, I found some peace and comfort in his words. I’d like to share them with you today.

“In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond;

And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring.

Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.

Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.

Is the shepherd not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?

Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?

For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?

And what is it to cease breathing but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?

Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.

And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.

And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.”

We’ve all been on this journey many times so at a soul level, we do know that death is nothing to fear. We do know that death is another leg of the journey of life. There is something liberating and peaceful knowing that unencumbered from the limitations of flesh and blood, our Souls can continue to contribute to this earth’s future. That at times, our Souls do decide to work from the other side before it would appear necessary to depart.

There is still nothing easy about being the ones left behind. It is not easy nor is it without the human feelings of overwhelm, sadness and despair. Especially when there are loved ones, babies and lovers left behind, the loss is especially great.

I asked myself a few questions during this time of grieving and I encourage you to ask yourself the same questions. “If I was to die today, would I feel that I had lived my life fully? Would I feel regretful about everything I put off till tomorrow believing that I had no time to do it today. Are there things that I would have like to express to my loved ones and didn’t? Is there anything I am afraid of doing that might have made a greater impact on the world?

Kahlil Gibran continues, “For in that day you shall know the hidden purposes in all things. And you shall bless darkness as you would bless light.” I trust that there are hidden purposes in all deaths, including apparently untimely deaths and I trust that as we grieve in darkness that Debrah has found the light.

May you create each day full of beautiful memories and loving thoughts,

Blessings,

janjanzen