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I remember about 10 years ago when one of my most popular expressions was: I have about 3 seconds of patience. I look back now and laugh because I was actually proud of the fact that I had no patience!
Although some people who know me today think I am still impatient, I have come a long ways towards developing more patience. But it is not an easy quality to cultivate as some of you may have noticed.
In the Bible, patience is one of the 9 fruitages of God’s Spirit. When we meet
someone who has the wonderful attribute of patience, they may seem especially “divine”! And of course, when we have to deal with a person who is impatient, (not looking in the mirror of course), we probably appreciate that impatience is a far cry from everything we aspire to be in our life! Yet it’s interesting that although we consciously choose to be “divine” rather than a pain the butt in someone’s life, we still often act impatiently. I caught myself doing it today and it certainly didn’t feel good!
The dictionary defines a virtue as a good or admirable quality, but another
definition is an effective force, power or potency. That is an interesting way to look at patience. When we exercise patience, we come from a far more effective place and it puts us in the place of power.
Why do I say that?
Have you ever noticed that when you are feeling stressed out, irritable, and impatient about something, you also feel overwhelmed and out of control?
Let’s say you are waiting for a contract or a deal to come through, a house to
sell, or an investment to pay off. When you are impatient, doesn’t it exacerbate the situation? Haven’t you found yourself pacing the floor, getting knots in your stomach or not being able to concentrate on anything else but the outstanding issue at hand? We all have.
How powerful or effective do you feel when you can’t even finish a sentence, a meal or a thought without your mind going straight back to the outstanding issue? You probably feel powerless in that moment as if there is something dominating or controlling your mind! Am I right? It is not a good feeling as I am sure you would agree.
So what would happen if you actually exercised patience? Isn’t it true that you would feel calmer, more peaceful and think much straighter? And isn’t it true that when you are exercising those characteristics in your life, you feel more confident and more powerful?
Patience is defined as an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or
annoyance when confronted with delay: We normally associate patience with having to wait or put up with a delay. But interestingly the first definition in the dictionary is the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like. In other words, when things aren’t going your way, the way you want them to, you don’t complain! Now that’s an interesting definition of patience!
It’s easy to whine, to complain, and to have an opinion about everything. But patience means being without complaint or irritation. It is far more powerful for you to be in place of acceptance of a situation and trust than in a place of irritability and annoyance. It’s much more pleasant for yourself and it is way more fun for everybody around you!
I am staying at my friend Monique’s home this month. On her fridge door she has posted several affirmations. Some of them apply to this conversation. For example: I go with the flow. I accept and utilize “what is”. I am comfortable with chaos, ambiguity and the unknown. I accept the “timing” of the universe.
How would you feel if you stopped getting your knickers in a knot every time you didn’t know exactly what was going to happen and when? That uptightness you often experience doesn’t empower you, nor connect you to the Universe as a trusted partner nor does it leave you with a good feeling in the pit of your stomach.
I trust that my soul conspires daily with the Universe to bring me the greatest amount of good in my life WHILE bringing the greatest amount of good through me to the planet. So I can relax because as long as I listen to the directions here below, the Universe and my soul can figure out the rest! It doesn’t mean that my level of patience is where I would one day like to see it, but it does mean that it’s a rarer day that I feel uptight and out of control. Those days of 3 seconds of impatience are long day – it’s now 5 seconds at least!
If patience is an issue in your life in any way, shape or form, observe the emotion that is BEHIND the impatience. Impatience is the outward symbol of another emotion – every single time. You could be angry at a person’s disorganization as I was today. You may be afraid that you are going to lose out on something that is important to you. Possibly you are worried that something bad is going to happen because things aren’t moving along as quickly as you would like. You may be concerned that you will have to do more work if others don’t hurry up and get their part done.
Once you know the emotion behind the impatience, it is much easier to deal with what is creating that emotion that in turn is creating the impatience. If you are indeed angry, worried or concerned about something, then YOU have the power to change your perspective of the situation. You will NEVER hurry anyone up just by nagging them. You already know that from plenty of experience trying to do it! You will rarely motivate someone through anger, fear or despair. However, you can certainly change your reaction and perspective, each and every time.
For example, today rather than have focused on the disorganization at the store when they couldn’t find my new glasses I had ordered, subsequently feeling anger about it inside and exhibiting impatience, I had a choice. I could have chosen to see all the good things that the staff at the store has done for me over the years, helping me out numerous time with extra sets of contacts, etc. and chosen the emotion of gratitude. Where would I have felt the most empowered? It wasn’t with the anger I chose, let me tell you!
As you begin to observe your impatient moments, I know you will be quite
astounded at the emotion BEHIND your impatience. You will also be empowered to deal with your emotion, rather than focus on what everybody else is doing, that you have no control over.
We are all striving to be more divine each and every day. You wouldn’t be
reading this newsletter if you weren’t looking for ways to create more love, joy, peace and prosperity in your life. None of us are perfect but by observing our reactions throughout the day to situations, we can certainly find ways to be more and more divine in everything we do and say.
Blessings,
This information is copyrighted. Please feel free to pass along, use as part of your spiritual newsletters but please keep all information including contact information intact. Thank you for your respect and integrity in this matter.
Jan Janzen is a non-denominational minister, author and entrepreneur. Her book Devil with a Briefcase: 101 Success Secrets for the Spiritual Entrepreneur along with her CD series for the Spiritual Entrepreneur and other resources for the entrepreneur with ethics are available at
www.spiritualentrepreneurinfo.com. For more information on Jan’s ministry and her support of microfinance projects around the world, please visit www.janjanzenministries.com
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